Batman vs. Superman

Critics hate it. Audiences love it. Apparently.

The Internet has gone insane with this movie. It’s practically polarised everyone. Everytime I go on Facebook, somebody is guaranteed to be talking about it. Mostly about how much they hate it. To be honest, most people were twitching in terror as soon as the movie was announced, and even more so when Ben Affleck was cast.
Now that the movie is out and I’ve gone to see it with an open mind…we have a VERY mixed bag here. This is no Dark Knight. But we aren’t in Batman and Robin territory either.

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No, no! Get it out of my sight!

And I have to say, I wasn’t overly thrilled with the idea of Batman vs Superman. Batman and Superman are about as polar opposites as you can get, but I wasn’t making up my mind before I saw the film.

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Was this ever going to end well?

Look, I love Batman like everyone else. He’s the one superhero you could actually be…if you had a billionaire bank account and access to incredible gadgets. Batman is dark, brooding and uses fear to his advantage. He made an active choice to fight crime and trained to get the skills necessary. And he has easily the greatest rogues gallery in the comic world.

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Yeah, I said it. Come at me, fanboys!

Pitching these two against each other just seems so….pointless. It’s like putting Donald Trump and Kanye West in the same room and making them debate each other on who was best. What you’ll get is a duel of egos which is entertaining for about ten minutes but gets incredibly old incredibly fast.

Superman is the big blue Boy Scout. He’s usually portrayed in a very bright manner. His weakness is Kryptonite but he’s also meant to be invulnerable. He’s so powerful, the villains need to be almost indestructable just to make it interesting.
Bringing such a contrast to Batman probably wasn’t the smartest move, especially after the fail that was Man of Steel. Some things just don’t need a gritty reboot.

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To be fair, he has solved his underwear confusion.

I don’t despise Batman vs. Superman and I don’t think the idea of superhero team ups is inherently bad either. The casting is good, and it’s nice to look at. Jesse Eisenberg was having a great time as Lex Luthor in a very different and surprisingly effective take on the role. Casting, visuals and acting wasn’t the problem here.

The problem with the movie is that the pacing is lacking (to say the least) and they try to do too much at the expense of the story and characters. So many plot points are shoehorned in it makes the head spin. The movie has no idea what the focus is. Is it about Superman’s struggle with responsibility? His relationship with Lois Lane? Batman’s double life? His vigilantism? Paranoia? That not-so-discreet reference to Citizen Kane in the opening?

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I think The Simpsons were more subtle about the homage…

The sheer amount of story being thrown at you is insane and there’s little time to develop anything. What was the point of Wonder Woman? You could have taken her out and missed nothing. That huge ending fight could have been cut by about 15 minutes. Alfred barely featured at all. What did Zod have to do with anything?
And for the love of all that’s good and holy, can someone PLEASE give Lois Lane some personality? And Superman too while you’re at it? Henry Cavill is a good choice for Superman and Amy Adams is a fine actress in general. Give them something to work with. Give them chemistry. Make us care. Give them an identity.
Batman vs. Superman was so focused on being huge and epic it forgot to be a movie. I went in hoping to see a decent action flick and instead got a potpourri of incoherency with a few good scenes. The action scenes may have been good, but we need to like the characters. Show more of Batman’s struggle. Show us how dedicated he is to cleaning up Gotham. Show Superman’s compassion, show him speaking to Jor-El in the Fortress of Solitude.
Don’t make these two heroes fight. Make them work together. That would be fine. Its worked incredibly well on the animated series. But having them square off against each other for pretty much no reason was not what we had in mind.
If you’re disappointed by what you saw, I highly recommend the animated series from the 90s. There were several crossover episodes which showed a far better dynamic and character development, and they weren’t condescending in the least.

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All credit to Doug Walker aka The Nostalgia Critic

I’d love to see a Justice League movie. I’m all DC. Marvel is good, but it’s not Batman. Warner Bros, if you’re going to do Justice League, it needs serious work. Go back and look at the comics and see why people love these characters. Have fun. Be true to the stories and personalities. Superheroes are far more than just punching things. I just hope you think of that instead of desperately trying to beat what Marvel has done.

 

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